Well, This Is Different

The last seven days were pretty eventful, game-wise.

Not for any earth shattering content update, or even for some in-guild or on server drama*, but for personal reasons.

A week ago, I began laying the groundwork to have Card begin showing up at the Tuesday Molten Core raid that Az currently attends. I figured I could switch off between the two for a while until I could determine a better long term plan. I knew where I needed to go --finish as much T1 as I could and obtain Zul'Gurub level gear with hit bonuses necessary to hit BWL (and higher) bosses-- but getting from Point A to Point B was the question.

My problem has always been that Rogues are far more in demand than Mages in Z'G for their ability to interrupt some of the bosses, so that even on those pugs when I do bring Card, the raid leader is frequently left trying to find a Rogue.** And so I volunteer to switch to help out.

Nevertheless, it looked like I could get Card moving in the right direction again, so it gave me the chance to relax a bit. I could go incognito, play around with an alt or two, and just keep an eye open for an instance that interested me and I could hop on Az or Card to see about getting in.

But some of my WoW friends had other plans.

***

By midweek, I began getting whispers from several of them, asking me to come along on Friday night. They were running MC after all, they said, so I had no excuse. Then on Thursday, I was tag teamed and leaned on until I cried "Uncle" and signed up.***

"I feel like I've been the subject of an intervention," I muttered as I clicked the sign up page.

The Friday Molten Core run went well --I don't think I've ever been in an MC run that was terrible, whether or not we actually kill Raggy-- and so I succumbed and said "okay" to signing up for Blackwing Lair on this coming Friday. What actually sealed the deal was that the guild sponsoring the BWL run decided to keep the MC run after all, but move it to Thursday.**** I still felt undergeared for BWL, but after last week I figured they were gonna pester me until I signed up anyway, so I decided to save them the effort.

We're here to kill you and all you can
do is whine about your beauty sleep?

Card found a new (old) home for Molten Core, and my friends successfully pulled me into Blackwing Lair. And that was that.

Or so I thought.

***

Monday was a holiday here in the US, and I had an eye to work on some projects around the house and begin work on a set of speakers for my wife's old mid-1980's all-in-one stereo.***** I got up early, and after I helped my wife get ready and out the door for work I pulled together a list, visited the hardware store, and began work on replacing a few rotted boards on the gate for our fence. I managed to free the boards but the bolts were stuck, so I hammered at them to free them up. Almost instantly ants boiled out of the so-called "good" wooden beams, and I realized that the entire gate would have to be junked.

Frustrated with that turn of events, I went back inside to cool off a bit and took my annoyance out on a metric ton of unsuspecting demons in Azshara.

While I was singlehandedly depopulating Azeroth of demons, I received a ping from one of my WoW friends.

"Hey, the guild is looking for a Fire Mage for their AQ40 raid team."

Then a separate ping from another friend announcing the same thing.

I sighed.

"I haven't even been in BWL yet and you want me to jump to AQ40? At least give me a chance to see how I handle BWL first."

Unlike Blackwing Lair, I did have at least some experience with AQ40. Back in 2010, my (now disintegrated) Horde guild decided that it would be fun to enter into AQ40 just to check the place out. We tried 5-manning it, and since we couldn't even get past the Prophet Skeram we returned a few days later with a full 10 man raid# and eventually made it through and downed C'Thun. I remembered Skeram for obvious reasons, but I also remembered the Twin Emperors because we a) didn't have a warlock along to tank the arcane Emperor, and b) because a Pally had magic damage, guess who got the job of trying (and largely failing) to tank that emperor. I also remembered C'Thun, because once you think it's dead, oh no.... You get C'Thun Part 2.

But I was told that I'd be fine, and respeccing as a Fire Mage was easy. I had my doubts, as I originally started Neve (remember her?) way back in pre-history as a Fire Mage and I knew the limitations of the spec, especially when not in a raid environment. After all, there was a reason why I spent a lot of years in WoW playing a Frost Mage. While I'd miss Frost, I could respec as necessary due to the synergy Fire Mages get when working together. (Greater synergy than Frost, to be fair.) 

But still, with very little T2 and almost no Z'G gear (like the Bloodvine set), Card was going to stink on the DPS meters. The guild's own documentation had a set DPS number goal for certain bosses --the ones you can just go balls to the wall and blast away-- and I knew I was likely not going to make that minimum number. So I told my friends that there was really no way around the fact that I needed to get my gear up in order to effectively raid with a main raid group. "I don't want to hold the raid back," I replied more than once.

"Go ahead and talk to the raid leader about it," I was told. 

"I did, a month ago, and I know where I need to go to get where I want to be."

And that, I thought, was that. 

Some hours later, I'd recovered from my disappointment at fixing the gate and was busy cutting wood for the speakers when my wife got off of work and came home.## After shaking off the dust, I followed her inside and we talked about her day while I grabbed a drink. I happened to walk by my work area and I saw Discord flashing, which I wasn't expecting.

It was the raid leader/co-GM.

"Somebody blabbed," I muttered, and I clicked to see what he had to say.

Sure enough, he'd heard that I was interested in the Fire Mage position and wanted to chat. 

"Well, here we go," I said, replying to his direct message.

I'm not going to discuss all that was said, but from his perspective the biggest barrier was whether I could raid late on Monday nights EDT. I paused a second, because I never even considered that part. Friday nights, and even Thursday nights are one thing, but Monday? But you know what, I'm up late enough that for me it isn't an issue, so I replied that yeah, I can raid on Monday nights.

But for every concern I had he had an answer, and he assured me that they'll work with me to get my gear to where it needs to be.

The next thing I knew, I agreed to go to AQ40 that night.

 

I almost went in the wrong instance.
For the record, this is AQ20's entrance.
The least the Qiraji could do is put a nice sign out front.

I'm actually surprised I didn't slice off a finger while I finished up my cutting, because I certainly wasn't that attentive at that point. I was thinking that "I've got to respec, then practice the respec, then figure out what pots to take to the run, etc. etc."

Then I got pinged in Discord by the Mage lead for the raid, and he dumped a metric ton of info on me about 2-3 hours before the raid invites were to start. There was a spec to mimic, Weak Auras settings to be installed/used/understood###, a basic rotation to work on, some pots to get, and some YouTube videos to watch to understand the mathematical and in-game underpinnings of how Fire Mages tick. (I still haven't gotten to that video yet. Sorry, Haldol.) Somewhere in there reading up on the strategies for AQ40 got lost, but oh well. I was going to do what I was told to do in raid, so I wasn't planning on worrying about that. Not with all this other stuff to absorb.

So here I was, at 9:30 PM EDT, drinking from a firehose and using the Scourge in Eastern Plaguelands as unsuspecting guinea pigs. 12 hours ago I was thinking about project lists, with saying hello to my old buddy C'Thun not exactly high on my priorities for the day.

***

And so that was how I went from looking for a new MC home to raiding AQ40 in one week.

What, you want to know how it went?

Oh.

It went well enough, I suppose. I made a decision to not look at the meters, because I knew it wasn't going to be pretty, but I only died six times on 4-5 total raid wipes. So not bad. The AQ40 mounts were dropping like flies, but since I was a guest I waited until everybody else from the guild got one first. That kind of got some of my friends upset, because they felt I should have been more assertive about that, but I wasn't about to barge in and do that sort of thing. That's not me, and I'm not going to change.

But what actually did keep me going throughout the raid were the whispers I got from my friends, who were really happy to see me up with them on the raid. And from the chat that the guild's Mages invited me into. Of course, knowing a couple of them already --Mages tend to stick together-- helped, but the espirit de corps of the group was infectious. 

The Prophet Skeram and the Twin Emperors were as I remembered them, so my memory isn't too far gone, but the "trash" in AQ40 definitely hit a LOT harder at level. So that wasn't entirely unexpected, but it meant that it took us a lot longer to get to the end than what I remembered.

Oh, we didn't down C'Thun, but I wasn't expecting us to beat that thing either. Burning down C'Thun at L80 is an entirely different experience at L60 in Classic, and things that don't hurt at L80 certainly do at L60. But I felt that the strategy that they were working out was fairly sound, it was just a matter of execution.

So that's it. I think it likely I'll be on the bench for next Monday's raid, because more than 40 signed up and I'm the new guy, but I'm fine with that. 

I presume the awkwardness will fade with time, and I've got a long ways to go before I feel like I'm actually contributing to the raid.

But yeah, this was a very different week than I expected.

Thanks gang. (And yes, I know that at least two people involved do read the blog. Commenting is always another matter, but I've been there, so I get that.)

*The guild I'm in has --on average-- about 3-4 active members as people have faded from playing or moved on to other guilds. It's purely social, as only two of us raid, and when I joined I didn't even raid at the time. It is one of numerous small guilds on the server that are frequently overshadowed by the medium and larger sized guilds on Myzrael.

**Yes, really. I'm not sure if it's just my luck or what, but in the Z'G pugs I've been in we always seem to be running short on rogues. At the time Az was still pretty much my main, so it wasn't a big deal.

***There were some issues getting the loot system for BWL properly configured so they ran MC once more. I was completely unaware of the switch until that moment, as I try not to poke around other guilds' Discord servers.

****I signed up for MC before BWL. Shh; don't tell anyone.

*****I've mentioned her stereo here before. I've gotten the turntable and radio working, but the cassette player will be a tough nut to crack as the rubber belt has disintegrated. The worst part of the stereo, however, are the speakers. They're crap, just a speaker in a box without any sort of engineering behind it.

#Until my first Zul'Gurub run earlier this year, that was my sole foray into raiding.

##Apparently I look hilarious wearing an N95 mask, but when you're cutting medium density fiberboard (MDF) you NEED one of those masks to keep the crap out of your nasal cavity. Saves you surgery and medical issues in the long run.

###I just want to know who came up with all of those settings/configurations. The amount of work it would have taken to initially come up with all of that would have been considerable, and that's not even counting the Weak Auras application/add-on itself. 

EtA: I have now gotten to watch that video, and after a week's worth of playing around with the Fire Spec, I understand what the video was talking about. I certainly wouldn't have understood it on Monday night, because after more than half a decade of being a Frost Mage, Fire was essentially a foreign language.

One Little Add-on That Changed WoW Forever

I was speaking with Shintar* recently when she pointed out that I worry too much about gear.

/raises hand 

Yes, that's me. I'm guilty.

But in that moment I realized something. I began playing WoW during Wrath, and if there was one hallmark of Wrath --outside of the destruction that raiding in Wrath caused to many guilds-- it was the omnipresent Gear Score.

Does anybody else remember the Trade Chat entries for ICC pugs to be something like "LFR ICC 10-man. GS 5000+ pst"? That magical 5000 Gear Score became a barrier to people getting into ICC and other raids, because it boiled down your gear, your skill, and your class to a mere number that people could point to and determine your raid worthiness.  I seem to recall that 5000+ meant at least a full T9 set, and probably at least one or two T10 pieces, which really meant you were capable of grinding 5-man dailies over a period of a couple of months. 

Skill? No.

Talent Spec? No.

Knowledge of the fights? No.

But you've got that gear, man.....

Blizzard indirectly encouraged the GS domination by having their own internal method of determining your "fitness" for entering the ICC 5-man instances via the LFG tool. Once you got past a certain point, and I think it was around the 3000+ GS, you could get into the Frozen Halls instances. I remember quite clearly when The Forge of Souls popped up for me, and I promptly freaked out. I was kind of expecting something more tame, such as Ajol-Nerub, but nope. 

"WTF is this?" I remembered whispering Soul back then.

"It means that you've high enough gear score to get into the endgame instances," he replied. "Congrats!"

I wasn't that thrilled, as it was a whole new set of strats to learn, and I knew I was starting at the bottom once more.

And the flaws of LFG had already begun to rear their ugly head, as one of the players I'd ported in with promptly dropped group, and this was on an instance with endgame implications and gear designed to get you ICC ready.

That sort of behavior sticks with you, and you wonder what you did wrong.

***

I guess I'd completely buried those experiences in Wrath somewhere deep inside my psyche, but I can still see a direct correlation between those experiences pugging via LFG and my behavior today, both the good and the bad. Every time you'd get The Old Kingdom as an instance, there would be at least one person who would drop as they couldn't be bothered to deal with a "long" instance when all they wanted was their daily badges. And every time I saw that behavior, I'd resolve that I'd never be "that guy" who put themselves over the group. 

But it also does explain my obsession with making sure my gear is "good enough", because I was once on the receiving end of being judged purely based on what I carried with me into a fight, not how well I performed in the fight. 

It's kind of bizarre when you think about it, because this is simply the same "judging" behavior from middle school and high school, picked up and transferred wholesale into an MMO. But with numbers to back it up.

***

Maybe I ought to re-evaluate Wrath some day, without the rose colored glasses that I have for my first exposure to MMOs. I'm not so sure I'll like what I see, but I believe being honest with yourself is one way to take a critical eye toward the assumptions you make whenever you play.

But trying to make me stop worrying about gear? Well, that's a topic for another time.

*Owner of several blogs, most notably Going Commando (SWTOR Blog), Priest With a Cause (WoW Classic Blog), and Neverwinter Thoughts (Neverwinter Blog). And yes, I can trust her to get at the root of a problem. She knows me way too well.

Off Topic: Take This Seriously, People

I'm setting aside the theme of the blog for this post.

It's a post I'd rather not make, because I'm neither a health professional nor involved with government, but sometimes amplifying the message is what's needed.

Covid-19 is no joke, and take appropriate steps to halt the spread of the coronavirus.

***

I've had one member of my extended family die from C-19, and another is clinging to life while on oxygen.* My nephew had what we believe to be a severe case of it, but it happened back in March when the hospitals were refusing to consider the possibility of kids with severe cases, but he managed to recover. My immediate family had just recently emerged from quarantine as my wife and the oldest mini-Red both contracted the virus.** While the cases we had in our family were "mild", I'm here to tell you that it is not even close to "just a cold".

In the case of my wife, it would have been considered a normal summer cold, except for two unnerving things: the lethargy and the lack of taste/smell. This isn't your normal "I'm feeling sick, I'd rather not do much other than sleep" sort of lethargy. I mean, this is the sort of lethargy that says "I don't want to get out of bed to go to the bathroom" or "I don't want to do anything other than lie right here" or "I don't want to drink or eat at all". I'd never seen anything like it, and as soon as the lethargy crept into her bones I started hassling her to go get tested. You've heard numerous times about the lack of taste and/or smell, but it's been over two weeks since she was cleared by the county board of health to return to work and she still hasn't regained anything from those senses. It may take months, or who knows, it might even be permanent.

The oldest mini-Red had more of what you'd call a chest cold if it weren't for the fact that her cough was a lot like pneumonia. She's had walking pneumonia before, and this was much more severe than that. She slept on the couch so as not to infect her sister --who stayed up in the room they share together-- and I kept close tabs on her at all times until the congestion and cough finally broke.

But the one thing that nobody ever tells you is that when Covid-19 enters your home, your paranoia ramps up considerably. 

You're always wondering if you sneeze or you cough "Is this it? Am I finally catching it?" Or every time you check on one of them you think "Is their temperature going to spike? Are they going to have trouble breathing? Will I have to call 9-1-1?" And, somewhere in the back of your mind, is always the gnawing fear that something even worse will happen and they'll be gone within a day.

As much as you like to think you can, you can't quite compartmentalize your fears and just carry on with work as usual. Maybe health professionals can, but I certainly can't. And I know this situation has affected my mental health in other ways; I'm a bit more abrupt with friends and co-workers, and I don't want to lean on "Covid-19 quarantine" as an excuse. 

It has also crept into my game playing, as I'm sure it contributed to my feelings playing WoW the past few weeks. But it's not something you can just come out and tell people, you know? "Nah, I'm not feeling like joining an Ony pug, gang, because I've got the blues from dealing with a household with Covid." 

At times like this, mindless farming in game has helped me to just simply stop thinking about things for a while. Like tonight, where I realized that Card hadn't reached max fishing, so I stood there on the docks in Tanaris, constantly casting, forgetting everything for a while, and even forgetting there was a chance I might even join a pug raid tonight.** Or later, I got on to farm Felcloth, and forgetting that I'd been fishing earlier, I was fighting Satyrs equipped with a fishing rod.

Basically stuff that I'd never have screwed up in-game before, I was messing up constantly.

***

I wish I could thwack every idiot out there --and yes, that does include extended family members-- who thinks this isn't a big deal. 

IT IS A BIG DEAL. AND WE ARE STILL LEARNING THINGS ABOUT THIS VIRUS IN REAL TIME WHILE WE'RE TRYING TO GET A VACCINE TOGETHER. AND WE STILL DON'T EVEN KNOW THE LONG TERM EFFECTS OF ALL THIS, SO CUT THIS IDIOTIC SHIT OUT!!!!

There.

And if there's anybody whom I play with who stumbles on this, I apologize for my moping around in game. Now you know a bit of the reason why.

*Due to his prior history he's only able to take oxygen via a mask, rather than a ventilator. The last I heard, which was the other day, he was doing slightly better. He's always been tough --a retired firefighter who had several bouts of cancer-- and he's giving the virus a run for it's money.

**The other two mini-Reds tested negative: one when he was tested as he arrived at university, and the other received a test because she works at a restaurant and could have potentially infected a lot of people otherwise. I showed no symptoms, and because of that it's pretty hard in my state to get tested. So I assumed I was asymptomatic and behaved accordingly.

***The raid happened, but no spots were available. Just as good, because to be honest because my mind simply wasn't in it. 

 

A Friday Scene

 

Upon Taking the Oaths

The compassion to pursue good, the will to uphold law, and the power to defeat evil—these are the three weapons of the paladin. Few have the purity and devotion that it takes to walk the paladin’s path, but those few are rewarded with the power to protect, to heal, and to smite. In a land of scheming wizards, unholy priests, bloodthirsty dragons, and infernal fiends, the paladin is the final hope that cannot be extinguished.
--From the Dungeons and Dragons Players Handbook v3.5, pp 42.

 

While I've been pondering Cardwyn's future, I've taken the time to, in her sister Linna's words, "Go bash a Defias."

I suppose it's not a big reveal that like Card*, Linna is short for Linnawyn. I was going to go strictly with "Linna" when I created her, but since it wasn't available her formal name will do.

And to be honest, Card likely thinks it incredibly funny to hear Linna's full name, as she only heard it on the farm when she and her older sister were in trouble.

"First Card and now you, Linna? Are you
sure that Mom and Dad are okay with this?"

Being a Paladin means that her path is going to be quite different than Card's. Paladins and Warriors have to slog through leveling, and Retribution Paladins --like I'm envisioning for Linna-- don't have the advantage of being good tanks that Warriors do. 

But hey, it's all about the journey, right?

Right now, Linna is whacking away at Defias, Murlocs, and Gnolls in Elwynn Forest, and I'm still working through a rotation.

Not Hogger, but still good for getting in
some good practice. Still have to get a two handed
weapon that does decent damage, tho.

But what really made me stop and wonder was the quest for learning how to rez people:

I was amused that the Dwarf called
his companion being daft for being brave.
After all, isn't that what Paladins are supposed to be?

With the impending release of Shadowlands, how is this going to work for retail going forward? Are people  suddenly going to pop into the Shadowlands when they die in game, and have to be pulled back into the "regular world" when they're rezzed? Or if you die in Shadowlands, where do you go? Oh well, I wasn't planning on checking that out anyway, but the mechanics of this alone would make my head hurt.

Regardless, I've been having more fun leveling Linna than I expected. I think that I'm so familiar with Elwynn Forest by now that I've just come to accept that she's gonna die at the hands of the murlocs, and that she has to pick and choose her battles when fighting packs. But I'm also not desperate to level her, either, so I've got plenty of time to work through rotations, learn how the Classic Paladin really plays, and go from there.

*Or Cardy, as some people call her on Myzrael-US. I would have never expected that nickname, but you know, it's pretty good. Far more people say "Card" than "Cardy", so when someone says "Cardy" I pretty much know who they are. The only times I really hear "Cardwyn" are when raid leaders do it, such as when they're calling out marks for sheeping in the Majordomo Executus fight in Molten Core.

Watch: Jasper Hour Classic on YouTube

Okay, after Monday's rant, I'm going to pivot* and promote a friend/acquaintance of mine** in WoW Classic.

Jasperin is a Pally Tank on Myzrael-US, and is probably one of the best Classic Pally Tanks I've ever seen. He frequently blows my mind with his skill in out tanking well geared Warriors, even though in raids he's frequently a Healer. And even when going balls to the wall on Cardwyn, I've never had issues pulling aggro from him. Yes, part of it is me being a good party member and waiting for Jasper to get a good grip on aggro before attacking, but even then on a lot of Pally tanks they'll still lose aggro. But not Jsaperin.

The guy is good.

And to match it, he's probably one of the nicest guys I've met on the server. Yes, I've been in Discord chat with him, and he's just as nice in Discord as he is in game. In fact, he reminds me of a guy I knew when I was much younger and at college; my friend back then was just as unflappable and upbeat as Jasperin. And like my friend, just about everybody on the server seems to know Jasperin.

Why am I talking Jasper up? Because he just started a YouTube channel to provide info about Pally Tanks, Boss Guides, and other assorted topics. Before you ask, no, his skills are in Pally Tanking, not video creation/editing, but he still provides a lot of data in his videos. One of his goals is to do a two Pally tank run of Zul'Gurub in Classic, just to prove it could be done. I've already volunteered to be part of his run if he wants me, but I think it likely that he'll want to do it as a run with his guild, Mystic Bond.***

Jasper Hour Classic

Now, after all of this, why am I promoting a YouTube channel when I implied yesterday I'm not too fond of them? Because Jasper puts in the work and figures things out. He has a grasp of the finer points of Pally tanking in Classic that a lot of people don't get and simply dismiss Pally tanks as --at best-- only good for instance running. And I'm not against YouTube channels as much as I am against the feedback loop that Blizz gets from using the PTR servers to overemphasize raids over everything else. 

Jasperin only has a few videos up so far, but he's intending to make more, and they're very much worth a view.

In addition to the channel link above, here's a link to his video about using two Pally tanks in Upper Blackrock Spire:

*Sorry about the obligatory Friends reference.

 

**Where is the border between when an acquaintance becomes a friend in a MMO? That's a question for another post, I suppose.

***Mystic Bond (or MB as known on the server) straddles the line between casual and progression raiding, but they lean hard on the progression end of things. Yes, they're that good. And to reference my post from several days ago, the guild's personality is of a light hearted yet serious bunch. If an MB guildie is in an instance pug or raid pug, you know you're getting both a quality person as well as a quality player.

Monday Rant: Why Do PTRs Exist?

Seriously.

I understand the desire of video game developers/publishers to let the players beta test your new content and save money, but PTRs have become so much a part of the development process that nobody has stopped to say "why are we doing this at all?"

After all, if the entire point of playing a game is to experience new material, why allow everybody the ability to cheat like this? Is it just so that the elite raid teams can get "practice time" in on the next raid, and then they can provide a strat for everybody else?

If that's the case, then the entire point of MMOs is simply "how quickly can you finish a raid". 

***

As you can tell, I dislike the concept of "open betas" and "PTRs" in the first place. They keep all players from experiencing content at once, and instead of everybody muddling through and trying to figure out how to handle new content, the sandbox is already there for people to try to figure it out beforehand. 

I was in a run --I think it was Upper Blackrock Spire-- when one of the players commented that it is so much better now in Classic than in Vanilla because we all now know what to do; back then we were all muddling through trying to figure it out, but now we've the advantage of 15+ years of insight to know how to handle things. While I agree that it is nice to have detailed data to fall back on, I'm not convinced it is "better" now. We just know what we have to do, and all we're left with is just execution. There's no "hey, this isn't working, let's try this instead" or "WTF was THAT attack about?"

The thrill of discovery, and the knowledge sharing that happens following a "eureka!" moment is all lost. Now it's all about "Go look it up on the forums" or "Check out the YouTube video for how to run it".

Perhaps if dev staffs got back to not using PTR servers, MMOs might see a resurgence in that Vanilla excitement that nobody seems to be able to generate anymore, yet everybody complains about.